Now that we have established a pattern in the scriptures with intimacy and know that it is God- given, should we think about teaching our children? I'd love to hear any success stories you may have had with this as I prepare to share the experience Mr. Napes and I had teaching our daughter.
In the mean time, I recommend a copy of the book, "And they were not ashamed" by Laura Brotherson- sold at Deseret Book (mentioned in a previous comment). It is a strong source of insight, facts, and helpful tips that are valuable for the husband and wife. Reading together and talking about it opens opportunity. It removes pressure from the conversation because it becomes the conversation starter. It provides information in clear and careful detail for potential success.
Other wonderful thoughts have been expressed in the comments from those that visit this sight. I want to share informative facts on this topic that are enlightening, but don't want to offend the sensitive reader. Most of us share similar questions and concerns. As with any blog, offering helpful tips or information on cooking, sewing, photography, etc., this happens to be the subject I am comfortable with. I guess in the end if no one reads it, my children may have the chance to avoid frusterations by learning.
In a world teaching falsehoods- may we learn more truth.
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Anonymous,
ReplyDeleteI am actually happy to hear that it is desire alone, but would deffinatley still recommend sharing with your physician all that you have with me- for more insight and possible help. There could be hormones affecting your desire...it's worth exploring. The health care part is difficult, I know and I send you my best to make the right decision for your family.
In a comment on my last post I described a few reasons coming together is critical in resolving stress from other areas in life. Knowing that you love your husband dearly, and knowing that we all have stresses, I am wondering what would happen if your emotional side to this struggle were focused on the purpose of coming together and not the sex alone. It may take time to adjust this process. I am curious to see the result of your thoughts if the preparation were focused on the connection with him to create strength in other areas of life. Often times the idea of sex is overwhelming and blah. When we attach the reason for sex to other emotional areas in marriage that are strong, it opens a chance for more desire.
Another thought: I am so happy that you can orgasm. I share this because of the beautiful things this can do for you. Orgasm surely is pleasant but also offers other benefits as well. It strengthens our ammune systems so we can fight off diseases and other ailments. It creates endorphins that are natural "fever relievers" which strengthens our health as well. It creates a threshold to pain, reduces stress, and actually increases our life span. MANY fantastic things come because of this gift, and happiness is increased in daily life. There are three different kinds of orgasm for a woman. All have different purpose in nature. All are benificial to life. I am thrilled your body can recieve these blessings.
Much like taking a vitamin or excersising, it sounds like sex isn't enticing, though it IS good for you. I applaud you again for your willingness. These reasons may be the core of your focus for a time as you continue with this battle.
I don't know if you are a religious person, but I can promise you ALL things are possible (hormones permitting) that your desire can return with God's help. The trial for all of us in any battle is the Lord's timing. He may see fit to wait in blessing you with change for a time. Stay patient, because there are great lessons to be learned. I am able to offer this blog AFTER much trial in this area with my husband and I, which has helped me to learn and grow ( and I have MUCH to still learn and many ways to grow).I am ABSOULTLY certain prayers are answered. How and when is not my department though :) Press forward my friend. PRAY for desire to return even if you are exhausted. I know you can! I'll continue to pray on my end as well. I am excited to watch a miracle come forward in time, and while you wait, thank Heavenly Father for this trial...literally. This is a strange concept at first and a challenging one, but when we offer grattitude for the challenges we are given- his heart is softened for our humility. He then gives us greater insight and our characters are solid even if the trial isn't removed. To become like Christ is the ultimate goal. Isn't it amazing that he is using intimacy to draw you closer to him in faith.
Hope any of these words draw comfort, and thank you for allowing others to learn because of your life.
P.S. Kiss that husband of yours on the four head for me. Reassure him that you won't orgasm every time and that this is normal and ok as well. Have him ask for help outloud-if you pray as a couple- for your challenge as often as he can, and love will drip from your relationship in abundance.
This last comment is in reference to the author of a few comments from the post: # 7 "Pauls help".
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