May 1, 2009

Consciously Prepare

Today's post is about consciously preparing to share your love.

Consciously preparing? What is that suppose to mean?

Ask your self this question...what have you done today to prepare for sexual closeness with your spouse? It is the greatest unifying experience- most literally, and maybe we would look forward to the connection a bit more if we prepared and planned for it a bit. This could be done in many ways.

Some ideas for wives: Setting the stage for closeness. Cleaning our room perhaps. Getting the piles of laundry put away and clearing any clutter that may dilute the romance a bit. Planning to get a baby sitter so the evening is spent without the children. Picking out music, candles, or something beautiful to wear. Shaving our legs. Texting our husbands and letting them know we are looking forward to being with them. Thinking of a new approach to the routine of togetherness. Writing a note about the evening that's planned and putting it in your husbands car/coat the night before. Anything we can consciously think of to express our love BEFORE the heat of the moment. These simple acts of thoughtfulness not only show support for the relationship, it prepares your own mind and heart to share yourself as well.

Some ideas for husbands: Allowing her to focus by taking one thing (or a few) on your wives "to -do" list and mastering that for her- it can do wonders. How about buying- better yet- picking flowers. Take a sharpie marker and leave her a note on the mirror with how you really feel about her (yes- it washes off). Text her a message. Make her dinner. How about YOU arranging the sitter? Grab her favorite candy bar and toss it in the freezer for later. Anything loving that you may not do regularly is to consciously prepare. Maybe you should shave your legs...I'm kidding, but seriously, when we consider and prepare for the night/morning/afternoon together, it changes the purpose in our physical unity. It takes us back to the dating scene and THAT is where we fell in love from the start.

In the scriptures it says, "Thou shalt love thy wife with all thy heart, and shalt cleave unto her and none else." Doctrine and Covenants 42: 22. In the footnotes of this verse it says: Family love within; love; marriage, Continuing Courtship in; Marriage husbands; Marriage wives. These footnotes are a reference for more study. Could we be applying ourselves to continued courtship more fervently?

It is the preparation that lingers in our minds all day. It helps us look forward to sexual closeness like we would look forward to going out to dinner, or going on a vacation, having a day off, (fill in the blank with what brings you joy). In planning for sex, we can enhance sex. Take time to remember the beginning of the relationship and center your efforts on those feelings of love. May our marriages defy all that is in front of us to distract and pull us apart.

I would write more but I have a text to send (wink- wink- nudge-nudge).
Best of luck!


  1. I love it and really miss it if there is a long jag of not getting it.

    Courtship I mean! I love it when my hubby does things that remind me and feel like we're dating. I'll have to remember to mention that to him!

  2. Hey- just to let you know... If I hadn't read your blog I would not have known about your 'due benevolence' info from Corinthians and I would not have been able to use that scripture in my 'dating' class at Enrichment last night! Love you lots! Thank you for teaching me!

  3. thank you. sex is a difficult topic for me. i was raped at a very young age, consequently i often have to work very hard to have this closeness with my husband. i have often wondered how to teach my children about sex so they can have a helthy and ritchous view on it. thank you for your insights.